Monday, August 11, 2014

Motivational Monday: The Old Me

Since I made a post on Saturday about how I was recommitting myself to Weight Watchers starting yesterday (Sunday), I figured I would skip writing a "Weekend Wrap-Up" post. The idea for this current post came to me when I actually had time on my hands (a rare occurrence) to take a walk down memory lane by leisurely browsing through old photos of me on Facebook. It was a significant moment for me when I realized for the umpteenth time what I used to look like when I was carrying an extra 75+ pounds around with me on my body. I thought I would share these pictures because they are a good reminder of why I started Weight Watchers and why I continued on this journey despite the bumps along the way.

I could write a million words about "The Old Me" but I would rather just share these pictures. The first few pictures are from my time in college when I gained more than the "Freshmen 15" because I never learned how to eat healthily. The other pictures are from the year after I graduated college when I had not yet started Weight Watchers because I didn't have the means or motivation to join. In the months following my college graduation, I felt in a rut even when I landed a somewhat part-time job working in a pharmacy. A combination of feeling depressed but having money to buy whatever food I wanted, led to my weight being at its highest.

In all of the pictures you can see how happy I am because I did love myself and the life I was living when I was heavier. However I can say now that I truly feel more like myself now than ever before. I can with 100% certainty that I feel far more confident, happier, and beautiful weighing 75+ pounds lighter these days. While I loved every moment in college, a small part of me wishes I could back to relive those days now that I have more energy & confidence being a smaller size. The pictures below give me the motivation I need to continue my journey towards a healthier lifestyle. I'm hoping this post will be a reminder for me of why I started my journey and why I keep going...

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Saturday Special: Where's Jax?

Wow, I can't believe I haven't posted since last month. I've been so busy these past few weeks that I haven't had much time to make posts. Additionally, I've been utterly failing on Weight Watchers by eating so terribly. A lot of my food choices have been the result of anxiety & stress, which is what I've been battling with due to various situations beyond on my control these past few weeks. However now I'm just eating food because it tastes good in the moment and I think I've gotten bored with I think my options are for what I can eat on Weight Watchers.

The reason I'm making a post today is because I really want to get back on plan with Weight Watchers. I've been absolutely terrible with tracking all of the food that I eat. I skipped weighing in on July 30th because I knew I would have a gain and I had plans to go out of town for a few days. I didn't know how I would do with my eating even though I packed, prepped, and planned out what I was going to eat my few days away from home. So despite all of the work I put into trying to stay on plan, I was basically mentally setting myself up to fail anyways. This was on top of dealing with a rough week beforehand where I was emotional eating in order to cope with high amounts of stress & anxiety.

I'm back now though but I'm a bit lost of where I need to start/go. I know I need to talk with my leader but I don't know when I'll get a chance to see her next. Alas, that's why I'm here to write out some of my thoughts to help keep me a bit organized. I have already blown my plan today and I'm going out to hang out with friends tonight so I don't foresee me jumping back on the Weight Watchers bandwagon directly until tomorrow. However, tomorrow is a new day and I can have three days (Sunday, Monday, & Tuesday) to eat well and continue with my exercising in order to help my weigh-in on August 13th.

First, I want to focus on the positive things I've done despite the boatloads of unnecessary stress & anxiety I've been dealing with...

  • I've been diligently working out 5-6 days a week still
  • I'm completing my new fitness routine two times a week
  • I'm still getting in lots of fruits & veggies (especially fruit though, oops)
  • I haven't been drinking soda very much
  • I added some foods to my "Do Not Buy" list
  • I've been avoiding gluten so as to not upset my stomach

In order to snap back to reality, I did choose to weigh in on August 6th. Shamefully I gained 3.8lbs but I know it could have been a lot worse. Plus, I'm still in the 150lb zone and that makes me exceptionally happy! Now I just want to make it a goal to get to the 140lb zone by the end of September which is totally doable.

Since I'm feeling lost as to where to start back with my weight loss journey, I just need to do a mental overhaul. Starting tomorrow I'm dedicating myself to doing the following:

  • Tracking EVERYTHING that I eat
  • Updating my Weight Loss reminders in my phone
  • Eating more protein in a day so I have fewer points+ at the end of the day
  • This will lead me to eating fewer processed foods/snacks
  • Pre-tracking/planning out what I will eat for each day as much as possible

I think the list above is a good place to start. I don't want to immediately throw myself back into tracking my intake of fruits & veggies or making sure I get in a colorful variety of power foods every day because I find that sometimes it just takes TOO much work to do that and often becomes too time-consuming. However, I think it's very important for me to start cutting back on how many processed foods I eat in a day. Far too often I would have 6-8 points+ left at the end of the day (about a third of my daily points+ target) that I could eat in snacks. At first I was trying to eat popcorn at night which is a Weight Watchers power food but soon my schedule will change and I'll be working until much later in the evening, so I won't have that option of heating up noisy popcorn when I come home from work at night. Plus, I was also just phasing out of liking my array of popcorn varieties which I knew was bound to happen sooner than later.

Therefore, I'm hoping that by completing and focusing on the tasks above, I can begin to get back on track. I just want to take it little steps at time. My biggest challenge will be fighting off those initial food desires where my brain will yell at me for all of the snacks I've been having lately. If I can just find other things to do (e.g. hobbies, activities, gaming, etc), then I think those cravings will slowly melt away.